shattered.

tonight i learned reeeeeeally quick what Jesus experienced for people. Matthew 9: 36 says Jesus saw the crowds He was healing and preaching to, and He felt compassion for them. Think about that. The God of all love, the very source of love, comes and puts on flesh.. then, as He is expressing that love, He feels compassion. Can we not feel the weight of this? Jesus was overcome with an extra dosage of longing for these people. He felt for them. Empathy overtook the Messiah and it birthed a desire in Him to see them loved. Why did He feel this way? "They were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd." Jesus saw a people trapped and in desperate need of help. He was moved deeply within His soul to call the disciples to action.

Here's the catch.

We are those disciples. Jesus has called us to pray for God to send workers into the harvest field. The problem here is, once you start praying, He stirs you to become what you're praying for. I said problem for a reason. We aren't any different from the crowds Jesus felt compassion for. There is one thing that separates us.

We are harassed as they are. Our harassment, however, is our own comfort. We find it entirely too hard to step out of our well-being, our contentment, our complacency. The problem of remaining comfortable is losing the commission of the One who showed us compassion in the first place. He called us to feeeeeeel what He felt and to be vessels of His love and redemption to others; we're too comfortable to heed His command? Have we come so far to believe that God is for our convenience instead of His own glory and bringing freedom to the captives?

The difference between "us" and "them" is helplessness. We are not helpless; we just refuse to help ourselves. The God of all existence has called us to be His hands and feet, scratch that, He's called us to GO.. simple. He said, "Go." Romans 10 says, "beautiful are the feet that bring the good news." feet.. all He said was go and He'll do the rest for you. He's with us ALWAYS. What is there to fear?! We are not helpless; We have overcome our harassment.

We have overcome our comfort.

Jesus stepped out of Heaven; the least we can do is get off the couch and step out our front door with the intention of sharing what means most to us.

Tonight, I was reading at starbucks and this mother and her daughter walked in. I took a quick glance and went back to reading. The mother seemed detached and the daughter, somewhere around 14 years old, looked like she walked out of Hot Topic and right into Starbucks. Don't get me wrong, I used to go there for band shirts, but I think I helped you grasp a mental picture. They sat down on the couch across from me, so OF COURSE I'm going to eavesdrop. Jesus did it to the disciples; don't judge me. They immediately pull out their phones and there is no connection between them. Finally, they interact and what followed was heartbreaking. The mother nags and nags because she feels her daughter is "too far gone" (my assumption, but it's spot on, i'll betcha). The daughter has never known what love looks like.. which explains her desperate cry for attention by her outfit. She just. wants. love. Don't we all? Can you blame her? Can you see how she is harassed and helpless, in desperate need of the One, True Shepherd. It got worse. The mother inquired about the scabs on her daughter's arms. She had been cutting herself. The conversation became heated quickly and the daughter stood up and said they were leaving.. and they did. Broken. Shattered. I cried out to God for breakthrough. God is faithful. If you ask Him to break your heart for what breaks His, He'll come through.

God is not looking for swarms of people, He's looking for a few good men who will carry the torch of love to the nations. The fire follows, but He's looking for a few good men (and women) to cry out to Him to send workers and to then become those workers. You will have to leave your comfort, but I prefer to find my rest and refuge in the Lord and not myself. I refuse to let a rock cry out in my place. Choose you this day whom you will serve, right, Joshua? Well.. as for me, I'll serve the Lord.

There's room at the Cross for everyone. Act like it.

God, move in us and through us. Break us and move us to usher in brokenness. Bring breakthrough. Come to us, Jesus. Oh, Jesus, come to us. Let it be so.